Fair play then Yorkie, I'll let you off.
On a serious note one of the meanest men I've ever seen was at the Downing Arms in Bodfari. He was an old Welsh farmer and he ordered one mixed grill and two plates so that he could share the meal with his wife. He then ordered a pint and came back when the glass was nearly empty and asked the barmaid for a third of a pint of beer to go in his nearly empty glass.
I know what his trick was and that was for her to fill his glass up and only be charged for a third of the price.
The barmaid must have known the guy though and politely explained that the measures are only for a pint or a half so he agreed to pay for the half and then she filled a half pint glass and poured that into his nearly empty pint glass.
His face was a picture of disappointment.