Author Topic: Clean Jokes  (Read 205087 times)

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Offline Merddin Emrys

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #45 on: October 03, 2010, 10:49:42 pm »
the Police dog station has had a break in and all the equipment stolen, Police say they have no leads so far  _))*
A pigeon is for life not just Christmas

Offline Quiggs

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #46 on: October 03, 2010, 11:45:31 pm »
I agree with you Ian, they are getting worse, perhaps you could introduce your worst Jokes category after all.  ;D
Dictum Meum Pactum


Offline Merddin Emrys

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #47 on: October 04, 2010, 06:57:36 pm »
 *&( I thought the last 3 jokes were really good ;D _))* L0L
A pigeon is for life not just Christmas

Offline Fester

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #48 on: October 04, 2010, 09:55:50 pm »
Yeah, but Merddin, .... unfortunately they really weren't .... and you did score 36 in that test remember!

Fester...
- Semper in Excretum, Sole Profundum Variat -

Offline Ian

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #49 on: October 05, 2010, 09:02:40 am »
 _))*
Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.  ― Michel de Montaigne

Si hoc legere scis, nimis eruditionis habes.

Offline Merddin Emrys

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #50 on: October 05, 2010, 09:34:00 am »
Yeah, but Merddin, .... unfortunately they really weren't .... and you did score 36 in that test remember!



Fester, I think your keyboard's gone wrong, I think you meant to say ' they were the 3 funniest jokes you've ever heard and you are still sewing your sides back together'   _))* _))* L0L
A pigeon is for life not just Christmas

Offline Merddin Emrys

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #51 on: October 05, 2010, 09:41:30 am »
I went in to Asda the other day and someone stacking the shelves said ' I bet you £20 you can't reach those pieces of meat on the top shelf' I said ' I'm not interested the steaks are too high' _))*
A pigeon is for life not just Christmas

Offline Fester

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #52 on: October 06, 2010, 12:19:11 am »
 _))* _))*  Now thats more like it Andy !

 $welsh$
Fester...
- Semper in Excretum, Sole Profundum Variat -

Yorkie

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #53 on: October 06, 2010, 07:41:39 pm »
I bought a chess set the other day. I started eating it but it tasted horrible, so I took it back to the shop and said, 'Here, this is stale, mate.'
The shop-keeper said, 'no it's not.'
I said, 'Yes it is. Check, mate.'

 _))*  _))*

Offline Trojan

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #54 on: October 06, 2010, 09:41:43 pm »
I bought a chess set the other day. I started eating it but it tasted horrible, so I took it back to the shop and said, 'Here, this is stale, mate.'
The shop-keeper said, 'no it's not.'
I said, 'Yes it is. Check, mate.'

 _))*  _))*

 L0L

Yorkie

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #55 on: October 07, 2010, 02:07:37 pm »
On a cold, cold night two bulls are standing in a field. One says "Boy it's mighty cold out here!", the other says "Yes, I think I might slip into a nice Jersey".    L0L

What does a fish say when it runs into a wall?
DAMN!    _))*

If a turtle doesnt have a shell, is it naked or homeless ?   :speechless:

How do you stop a fish from smelling?
Cut its nose off    L0L

What do you call a fish with no eye ?
FSH !    :rage:

Offline Trojan

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #56 on: October 10, 2010, 08:49:27 am »
  _))*

Offline Pendragon

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #57 on: October 12, 2010, 08:53:06 pm »
I've just joined Alcoholics Anonymous - I still drink, just under a different name. D)
Only hindsight has 20/20 vision
Angiegram - A romantic notion derived from the more mundane truth.

Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley

Offline DaveR

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #58 on: October 13, 2010, 09:08:50 pm »
Paddy lost his ear on a building site. His friend Murphy shouts out " is this it " ? Paddy looked and said " NO,mine had a pencil behind it" !   _))*  _))*  _))*

Offline Fester

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Re: Clean Jokes
« Reply #59 on: October 13, 2010, 09:51:09 pm »
I spent a while standing by my wife's grave today....
She didn't know, how could she?

She thinks I'm out here digging a pond.

Fester...
- Semper in Excretum, Sole Profundum Variat -